I burned the pork chops tonight. There I said it. I am not perfect.
My unimpressive dinner was served and as we ate it, my daughter didn’t mention a word on it. I was fully expecting her to look up from her plate after the first dry bite of the chop but she said nothing and instead continued to eat.
It didn’t help that earlier in the day, we had a little bit of an argument over the ability to explain oneself during our not so thrilling school work. I got more irritated then I should have and felt it happening but seemed to not be able to stop myself in the moment of agitation. She felt it.
I always apologize when I am wrong. But even still I don’t like to argue with my daughter. It’s a rare occurrence so when it happens it tends to stay with me longer than I’d like.
This day was one of them.
I cleaned the kitchen as I do every night before bed and just before turning off the light to leave the room, a thought hit me.
This kid is loved in a tremendous and downright fierce way.
Love is enough.
We have this notion that as parents we are the adults and as these adults we are in the leader role. Which may be true technically.
But these little people are our equals. They are human beings just like us. Go figure.
When they have a bad day, we give them extra love. We allow the tears to come. Yes as children they are still learning but I have realized we are too.
Age does not signify a threshold for when your learning stops. It’s continuous.
And what is learning without mistakes?
I am convinced that the role of parent is one that makes us do the most self reflection out of any that we have in life. It has a way that seems to highlight our shortcomings and point out those flaws we manage to hide from most people.
But parenting is raw. There is no hiding or pretending anything with these little people. They see everything.
Burning a dinner or snapping at a kid is not the way you plan your day ordinarily.
We want to serve great healthy meals and be the best loving person to our kids each and every day.
If you are a new parent, let me let you in on a little secret. Every day won’t be this way.
As we work on ourselves I can’t help but to mention the word forgiveness here. Not just us as parents teaching our children forgiveness but having it for ourselves.
Finding forgiveness for yourself ought to be as important as it is to forgive others for their weaknesses.
I went to my daughter’s room. Placed my head on her lap and let her love on me.
We talked and laughed about the horrid dinner. I felt the weight lift from me.
It’s ok to need extra love on your tough days too.
So please forgive yourself if you weren’t your best today or any other day you are doing this parent thing. We are all still learning.
Love is enough.